This is Blair Kaplan Venables and she is RESILIENT.
CONTENT WARNING: The I Am Resilient Project provides an open space for people to share their personal experiences. Some content in this post and on this website will include topics that you may find difficult.
Dear little buddy,
After learning I was pregnant with you, my world changed. I felt joy and happiness in an inexplainable way.
I was told in June of 2019 that I most likely needed IVF if I wanted to have a child. I was devastated to learn that because IVF may have not been in the cards for us.
I began to imagine my life without children. I began to comprehend that what I wanted may not be in my future. My heart was broken.
In October I found out I was pregnant with you, without the help of IVF. You, my child, were a miracle.
You filled the cracks of my heart with gold and heightened my faith in the universe. I embraced every moment with you. I loved watching and feeling my body change, knowing that you were a part of me.
Sadly, during the first trimester we learned that you had no heartbeat. Although I’m very, very sad, you taught me that I am a mother, I can be a mother and that I have love in me that I didn’t know was possible.
You were only my baby for a short time and you guided me down a path that I didn’t know existed. You revived me.
A miscarriage is nothing to be ashamed of. It’s scary, can be painful and it is really sad and lonely. I will be strong for you.
I will forever hold the future I had planned for us in my heart and I’m grateful for every moment I had with you.
I’m going to hold onto the happy feelings and the joy that I felt knowing we were together. I’m going to hold onto the hope that I will soon be a mother again.
I will always be in a state of healing and growth. I am even more resilient because of you.
Love, Mom
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???? Pemberton, British Columbia, Canada
