This is Tiffany King and she is RESILIENT.
CONTENT WARNING: The I Am Resilient Project provides an open space for people to share their personal experiences. Some content in this post and on this website will include topics that you may find difficult.
Describe the situation where you had to be resilient:
I was 12 years old when my aunt handed me my adoption/CAS records. “Want these or I’m gonna throw them out?” Of course, I took them. I stayed up all night that night, crying into those files. I obsessed over them.
Tiffany’s Story:
I was the creation of good night of drugs. My mom got locked up while I was in the womb. When I was born I stayed with my “dad” who was always doing drugs with his friends in living room, while my mom was in jail. She was supposed to come out on weekends to visit me but really, she never even came (god knows what she was doing).
I was three when my grandma adopted me, even though no one wanted that because I was so traumatized. She died in front of me four months later. I didn’t know until my brother got home from school and he blamed me and said, “You killed her!” Because everyone said I would be too much work.
I ended up with my aunt who would always say, “I was too much.”
My life was spent trying to get attention but my brother got it all. I feel my family resented me for killing my grandma, but she had an aneurysm. It wasn’t my fault.
I was always told, “we took you in!” As if I was just a stray. They “saved” me but I never felt saved.
How did you practice resilience when faced with this challenge?
I grew into this amazing person. I never quit. I used my talents to express what I needed. I got diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder and it has been the most difficult for me to come to terms with. I’m the one who took control and got a diagnosis.
Please share one piece of advice for people who are going through a similar challenge:
You are a sunflower blooming towards the sun. I want you to know that when the sun isn’t out, you are not alone. There’s an entire garden of us you can face.