The last few weeks have been unprecedented and has been unfamiliar territory. No longer being able to go to work, interact with friends and family, unable to go shopping, or participate in regular physical activities. Our lives have completely changed overnight and we are all experiencing what being in isolation from each other is like.
I have experienced isolation before. My life completely changed overnight in 2014. I was no longer able to go to work, socialize with friends, drive, go shopping or be active. I had sustained my third concussion and overnight life as I knew it was completely different. Due to the symptoms I was experiencing ,there wasn’t much I could do. Dissimilar to the times now, life continued on without me. I was housebound for most of a year, unable to live my life as I once knew it. It was a very unsettling time for me and trying on my mental health. What I once was able to do to manage my mental health, like exercising or meeting a friend for coffee, was taken away from me. I felt very lost for a very long time.
Being alone with my thoughts, not knowing when I was going to get better or get back into my regular routine was constantly on my mind. For me, this new way of life was unprecedented and unfamiliar. I know that a lot of people are feeling the same at the moment in regards to how life has changed for all of us during this time of Pandemic. When will life get back to normal? How long will life feel like this? How do I try and stay calm in a time of such uncertainty?
Those thoughts run through my mind constantly and did in 2014 as I worked through my Concussion recovery. I have been reflecting a lot over the past week or so on how similar I felt during that time. I only interacted with the people in my house or with family over the phone. I maybe ventured out once in a while to the grocery store. I went for very short walks close to home.
Although these thoughts are constantly on my mind, I feel that I am handling this time of isolation more positively. I have realized it is because the lessons I learned during that time of isolation during my concussion recovery have stayed with me. My mental health isn’t struggling in the same intensity as it did in 2014 as we go through this isolation period now.
I thought I would share what I learned at that time of isolation during my concussion recovery. What I learned to help me get through the uncertainty, how to embrace this new life and how to manage the mental health aspect of this new way of being.
Accept, Don’t Resist
Resisting takes up a lot of time and requires a lot of energy. Once I got to the point of being able to accept my new reality, I felt that I had more energy to put towards the things that mattered most. I realized once I accepted the new reality I was less stressed. The sooner you can find a way to accept the new reality, the less stressed you will feel on a daily basis.
Don’t Try to Be Perfect, Be Present
Being present allowed me to stay in the present moment. Worries come from focusing on the future, and the unknown. But by being present and focusing on what is in front of you at this point in time takes away some of those worries. I had no control over when I was going to recover, how much money I was going to need to spend on treatment, or how what I did was going to affect my symptoms.
Currently, there is a lot that is unknown now and may be for a while. So to focus on what is right in front of you may help you to keep some of those worries at bay. Be present with the people you are able to be around or those you can connect with. Be present with yourself. Focus on where you are at right now in your journey and what you do have control over. Focus on the moment to moment, day by day and soon the future will be the present and things will have changed for the better.
Surrender to Time
Time is a funny thing, at points, it feels like time is rushing by and at other times it feels as if we are in slow motion. I found that allowing the time needed to recover, whatever that meant, and however long it would take, would be worth the outcome in the end. I had to let it be what it was. Weeks, Months (for my concussion recovery – years). I allowed the time that I needed in order to heal to happen, and I healed successfully. If we give ourselves the time needed for the globe to heal, we will get to where we want to be.
Give Yourself Grace
During my recovery, I wasn’t able to achieve everything I had planned or wanted to do in a day or week. I either wasn’t capable of doing what I wanted to do because my symptoms would flare up or I would hit a wall and be exhausted and need days to recover. I had to be flexible. During your day, give yourself Grace, allow for adjustments and be flexible with yourself. Know that plans may change from moment to moment, day by day. Go with the flow, don’t resist and practice letting go. A great mantra I used was “oh well”, especially if something didn’t go to plan as I expected. I could either get frustrated or practice Grace and say “oh well”, tomorrow is another day.
Embrace the Fear
I dealt with a lot of anxiety during my concussion. At the base of my anxiety was fear. Fear I wouldn’t recover. Fear I would never be the same. The Fear I felt festered and grew. Because I was so isolated and fear was always at the forefront of my mind, fear crept into every aspect of my life. I started being afraid to leave the house out of fear of who I would see, what they would think and how it would make me feel. I tried to ignore the fear or get rid of the fear but it just seemed to only get worse. It wasn’t until I heard Author Elizabeth Gilbert speak about embracing fear that things actually started to change. She suggested to let fear in the car, but not be the driver. Take the fear with you but don’t let it be in control.
Once I allowed fear to be with me but not in control of me I ended up having more energy. More energy to put towards my recovery and practice the things I needed to do, such as be present. Knowing fear was with me I didn’t need to worry about fear showing up and taking over. I allowed myself to feel the fear but do what I needed to do anyway. Times are scary right now. Times are fearful. Life is hard. Let it be hard and let’s move forward together. Let fear in, but don’t let fear win.
Create a Foundation of Wellbeing
Focusing 100% on my recovery all the time wasn’t easy. I lost a lot of who I was and what it meant to be me since I wasn’t able to do my normal routine. I made sure I took the time to do things that made me feel like myself without jeopardizing my recovery. I am the type of person that needs downtime. Make sure you make time to do things that make you feel like you. Have downtime or alone time. Connect with those that fill you up. Eat some chocolate now and again. Enjoy a cup of tea. Play music. Find things that fill your soul, even if it can’t look exactly as you would like it to, find a way to bring those things into your daily life so there is some sense of being you.
Plan, Pace and Prioritize
The 3 P’s are a huge Cornerstone in Concussion recovery. I struggled with my energy levels and dealing with certain symptoms that would affect my ability to carry on throughout my day. If I pushed myself too hard one day, it could affect me for the next 1-3 days following. Which left me more isolated.
- Plan: Planning what I wanted to do really helped. I structured my days so that I didn’t spend too much energy on thinking about what to do, it was planned. I followed the plan.
- Pace: I had to pace myself and try not to push too hard in one day so I still had energy for the next day and the rest of the week.
- Prioritize: Prioritizing helped me choose what was important to ME vs trying to get it all done.
Time to practice the 3 P’s: Pace yourself as we don’t know how long we are in this for, Plan your days to make things easier on yourself (especially if you have kids) and prioritize what is meaningful to you. Don’t push yourself too hard, as you will need energy for the unforeseeable future.
Have a Goal
Choose one serious goal to focus on to help get you through this journey. Your goal needs to be meaningful to you in order to set yourself up for success. If you have too many goals in mind you may only achieve a little bit of each one. Ultimately you never really finish one. Having one goal and achieving that one before you move on to the next one will give you a sense of accomplishment. Paint that bedroom before you move onto cleaning out that cupboard. One thing at a time.
Trust in the Universe
There is always a greater good, a bigger picture that doesn’t always appear to us right away. Years down the road we sometimes realize why things happen the way they did. We may not understand why right now or any time soon but we can trust that the universe has a bigger plan for us. At some point, we may see what the bigger picture really was and what this was all for. Maybe this is the turning point in the planet’s recovery process, a turning point in what the planet needs in order for it to heal. Trust in the Universe’s plan, Trust in yourselves. Trust that all will be well.
Believe in Yourself
Know that regardless of how difficult and challenging this time will be, know that you got this. You will make it through. You will be able to handle what comes your way. You have been through hard times before and you got through. You have the strength and the ability to get through this challenging time, just as you have done before.
Do what you need to do to keep yourself healthy. Please practice Social Distancing, wash your hands, and stay home, especially if you are sick. To add to the list to be mindful of your mental health. Much like my Concussion Recovery, we will get through this, it will take longer than we want it to. Life may not look exactly as we remembered it, but we will get back to some sort of normalcy. We will.
Are you ready to share your story of RESILIENCE? You can do that HERE.
Written by Jana Kapp MScPT, I Am Resilient community member, Registered Physiotherapist & Concussion Management/Vestibular Rehab Certified. You can email her at concussionconsultation@gmail.com.
